Independence Day 2020

Before more time slips away, I wanted to share my Independence Day. I had thought that, since my daughter would be working and my son and his family would be up Bangor way, I would spend my day alone. Nope! I spent the day with my sister and part of her family.

A 4th of July Welcome

 One niece spent her time hiking. Hiking? Who hikes on the 4th of July?

The rest of us were far more sensible and stayed home eating and holding the baby.

This little girl was the center of attention. She's two months old now and staying awake longer and longer.

First Cousins Once Removed


Laurel was on her way to work an overnight shift and had just enough time to hold the baby.

I really like the photo above and below. The one above shows my sister looking on all smiles and the photo below shows where her lips usually are when she's holding her grandgirlie. ☺

I did not snag a picture of my brother-in-law Steve (who did all the grilling) nor of Anneke's big brother. That I will remedy by popping in a video of him meeting and greeting a turtle, shared by his mom. I have never seen a turtle run so fast!

It was a wonderful, enjoyable day. God is good. 

Twelve years ago today, John and I eloped. He was one of the best decisions I ever made. After he passed away, after only such a short time, I questioned myself. Today, I can smile and thank God for allowing John to be a part of my life. He was a love and so very good to me.

Thank you for your visit.

A Cautionary Tale

Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath

Ephesians 4:26

Now that is a tall order. I don't know about your personality, but mine leans toward "red alert" on its best day. 

Simple things can trip me — a post that never updates, a car that does not start or a groundhog clopping across my deck like a small pony. 

This "red alert" thing really goes bezerk when I feel someone I love has been wronged. 

Two weeks ago today, I entered The Ponderosa (John's place) for the first time since December. The snow was finally shallow enough to get through the door without climbing a snowbank. What I saw shocked me, scared me, and made me absolutely livid.

Someone had entered the building and stolen thousands of dollars of equipment. This was done while my tenant watched. She told her cousin the responding police officer (can you believe it?) that there was a woman who looked just like her landlord (me) and two men. She said that she thought nothing of it because there were always people there taking things. Really? Really?! 

To say that I would like to drop kick her to the moon is not too much of a stretch. Did she tell me? No. Did she call the police? No. Now I could say much more, in fact, I did and had to delete it, but this is the gist of it. 

There are other complications in this mess. Did you know that in my corner if you do not have the serial numbers from all pieces of equipment that the police will not even attempt to search pawn shops, etc.? 

I have told this story as a cautionary tale. Get those serial numbers, make sure your insurance is current, take photos, and have an inventory. Also, never assume that snow covering the door is a deterrent. These people shoveled their way in and shoveled the snow back covering their tracks. I feel like such a fool to have fallen for that trick. 

Perhaps you can imagine how much I feel I have failed John. Oh I know that he is not affected by these earthly things anymore, but he would have been some kind of upset if this had happened on his watch. I certainly regret that it has happened on mine.

This advice is good and the best philosophy/psychology/"the world" has to offer; however, it does not go far enough. It is true that we can not change the direction of the wind, but it is also true that we can't adjust our own sails either without the help of The Lord Himself. 

This issue is so big that I know I can't deal with it. I know my ongoing answer is forever and always in going to The Lord. I thank Him that this is just stuff and that no one was hurt, except for the financial loss and that sense of being violated. And I am really going to need His help to show grace. I can not begin to know why God allowed this, but since He did, He has a plan to work it all out. And I know that He will work on this angry heart of mine, too. 

Lest I Forget

Yes, I am already worried. Worried that I will forget my beloved's voice, the way he sang In the Garden in his deep, rumbly voice and often while driving. The way he chuckled, the way he laughed, the squeaky little laugh done just to amuse me.

So I am jotting down a few things to help me remember. 

John never left the house without kissing me goodbye and sometimes more than once, especially when we would start chatting all over again with his hand on the handle attempting to get out the door. Then I'd get another kiss because he couldn't remember if he had kissed me the first time. I never told him otherwise. As he was leaving, he'd say, "I'll be back." Sometimes I'd say, "Thanks for the warning!" Then we'd both laugh at the lame joke.  
He never arrived home without an "I'm back" and most often another kiss or a hug depending on how dirty he was. Oh that man could get more dirt on him than a mechanic in a pit. Sometimes I'd grumble about it and he would respond, "Now is that a very nice thing to say to a very nice guy like me?" 

When he finished a project he'd say, "There! Good enough for who it's for." I tried to get him to say it Here, but he just wouldn't cooperate that day. ☺ (Look for the video and the little bow John took.)

If I asked him how his meal was, he would usually say, "I don't know yet." There was never a time that he did not thank me for making his meals or changing his sheets or taking care of his clothes.

If I ever asked him to do anything, he was in agreement. Sometimes we had to set a date and an intention, but he was willing to go and do as I requested. Sometimes I had some unusual requests that "stretched his thinking all out of whack."

Evenings were usually spent companionably watching Wheel of Fortune and Jeopardy. (I haven't watched since May 20.) He trounced me night after night only requesting my help for literature and grammar questions. ☺ For the final Jeopardy question, we would decide if we were going to "bet the farm." We often won. It is true that two heads are better than one.  After that, he usually wished to watch some show about Alaska; I'll never watch that again either.

~typical grand greeting~ 

When seeing the grandsons, he'd ask, "How's my buddy?!" They always knew that they were his buds, too. This often involved a high-five and sometimes he requested a hug and they willingly gave him one. He sure loved them and I can see the love light in his eyes for them that I often saw for myself. Here's a good example.

He prayed for the boys every day. But then, he prayed for many every single day — his girls, his grands, his greats, his sisters, his friends, my friends, my family, me, and on and on. He really enjoyed praying for people and was happy to have remembered to pray and for what the specific need or concern was.

He had plans to write a book of his favorite tips for contracting/carpentering. He had even sketched out the chapters. He wanted to put in a new driveway, new counter tops in the kitchen, new floors, and probably a few other things; alas, time ran out. My son said the other day that John needed at least another twenty years.

Whenever situations arose that would make me say, "This is something we must pray about," he would say, "Oh dear, it's come to this." That was a joke indicating that it was ridiculous not to think about praying first about anything and everything. 

taken in April 2016, at a Retirement Party for a Dear Friend
You may remember a similar expression worn  Here

Oh there must be more; I can't have forgotten already. Wait! I remember another...one of my favorites. Every now and then I'd catch him looking at me and so I'd smile and he would say, "You're kinda cute (pause for emphasis) for a girl." 
This would have been our 8th anniversary...new beginnings. John began his ultimate new beginnings just six weeks ago. His sister gently chided me recently that there is no marriage in Heaven. Right. I know that. It won't matter there. But here, just for today, Happy Anniversary, Honey. I miss you like crazy.

Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling in at night. I miss you like...

~Edna St. Vincent Millay *** And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. Revelation 21:4

A Dollar Short and a Week Late

You know that I always go to the Hodge Podge if I need a jumpstart, kickstart, something. And the thing is, Joyce isn't even having a Hodge Podge this week so I am off the hook for linking and participating. I'm just using last week's for blog fodder. 

1. If you could sit beside and/or jump in any lake in the whole wide world today, which lake would you choose and why?

I would swim in a lake I love in New Brunswick, Canada. I enjoy swimming in lakes over swimming in pools or the ocean. I have even swum in a Great Lake (Erie), which was as close to swimming in the ocean as I like to be...very brrrisk! 

2. What's your favorite 'fruity' drink? 

Lemonade

3. I read a list here of thirteen things to do right now to simplify your life. They were-

clean as you go, re-evaluate your relationships (cut toxic ties), unsubscribe (too many blogs and websites), de-clutter, write down your daily goals, reply to emails right away, forget multitasking, create a morning routine, re-evaluate your commitments (which hobbies and responsibilities are most important to you), say no, clean up your computer, and plan your day ahead

Which of the tasks listed do you currently find most helpful in keeping life simple? Which item on the list should you adopt in order to simplify your life this month?

I like all of those ideas and follow many of them most of the time. There's going to be an entire summer of cleaning up and sorting ahead from barns to basements. I'd like to give up multi-tasking, but it just seems to be something I must do and probably because I have the attention span of a gnat.

4. What did you do the summer after you graduated from high school? 

Since I would be off to college in the fall, I worked that summer cashiering at a grocery store. I also dated a lot that summer as I'd be saying goodbye to my boyfriend at the end of summer. He remained behind for a year and then joined the Army so there were many goodbyes through our dating years. Yes, I eventually married him and, though the marriage failed, I have two wonderful children and two wonderful grands so I'd not change my circumstances.

5. Are you a fan of podcasts? If so what's a favorite? 

Have listened to some I have liked, but can't remember them and don't listen regularly.

6. Do you think today's fathers have it harder, easier, or just different than fathers in the past?

Different and harder. Nothing is getting easier in this crazy society of ours.

7. Tell us one way you're like your father? Or not at all like your father if that's easier?

I have often been told that I am quite like my father in temperament. We seem to share a little issue called "directness." This is also known as not having a filter. Oh dear. My pastor once told me that I was very like my father in the nicest possible way. Ahem. =/

8.  Insert your own random thought here.

So many random thoughts swirling the brain. Let me keep it to one! 

I have been working on memory boards for John's service and so have been wading through this remarkable life of his with all the family, friends,  and experiences of a lifetime. Would you like to see some photos?

John on the cliffs of Grand Manan

John and sisters at their grandparents' 51st wedding anniversary party back in the day

Do all 12 year old boys look alike?

 One of 8 memory boards... This is looking a bit sparse to me so must add a few more photos, if I can find some.

my cluttered work corner

Thank you for the ongoing prayers. I truly need them and feel  sustained by them. Now I have a question for you: is it going to make you feel uncomfortable if I continue to chat about John? Needless to say, he is very much on my mind, but I don't want to cause you to worry about my mental health or when I'll get on with this life that is, after all, for the living.

Missing John

How blessed I was! 

John 1944–2016

The good thing was that I knew that every. single. day. I loved him; he loved me; 'twas all that mattered. I know that I will miss him until the day I join him.

~love light in his eyes~or maybe a leave me alone~trying to get ready for church~

So we, my family and I, are finding our way through the grief of losing John. I have sometimes heard Christians huff that their loved ones are not "lost." While we know that John is safely home with The Lord, he is definitely lost to us here on earth. 
Sam and Jakob, my grandsons, have struggled a fair bit. John is their first loss; they have not even suffered the loss of a pet to prepare them for this thing — death. We met with John's pastor and the pastor's wife on the Sunday afternoon just after John passed and talked things through. When the pastor was readying to leave, he said that he would pray when Jakob interrupted asking if he could himself pray. The pastor said, "Sure, Jakob, would you like to pray first?"
Jakob's prayer:

Thank you, God,  for John in our lives. We know that he is still with us in our hearts and that one day soon we will see him again. Well, in that day. 

Not a dry eye in the room...
Dear Ones, I want to thank you for the love and support, prayers, cards, calls, and emails, and for reading here at A Haven for Vee. A special thank you to Abby at Little Birdie Blessings for holding down the fort when I had to remind myself to even breathe. I do not know what the future holds for blogging because, as Sam says, "Everything was better with John." I do have some stories to tell, though, so perhaps I will find my way back one day.

This was John on a hot day in May holding a bookmark the Texas Quads made. He was so pleased to have it and called it a real "day brightener." He sure loved my little corner of Blogdom and all the dear folks in it. This was the last photo I took of him. 
Closing with a reminder from Lorrie who had been doing some reading in my archives. Precious reminder!

As we strode along the path through the cemetery just enjoying the close of day and being together, John leaned down a bit and whispered, "Every grave will open one day." That's a thought worth getting excited about! Then we passed a grave well over a hundred years old where the inscription read Meet Me There. I can't think of a much better message to those of us following after.

August 3, 2008 

Guest Post ~ God Will Take Care of You

Dear friends of "A Haven for Vee", I'm Abby from Little Birdie Blessings, writing a guest post here at Vee's request.

So many of you have been praying and concerned for Vee and her husband since she last wrote on her blog. She would like you to know that her beloved John was called home to be with the Lord on May 28th. She is very appreciative of all the prayers that were spoken on their behalf, and has said she could feel them.

Vee is feeling quite overwhelmed and has chosen to close comments. I do believe in time, she will be able to share again here at "A Haven for Vee". Please keep Vee and her family in your prayers as they mourn.

Vee's favorite color is yellow and I thought the hymn "God Will Take Care of You" was one Vee could cling to during this time of sadness.  Perhaps it will be a comfort to you as well for whatever trials face you today.

This is a photo collage of a day last summer, Vee and John traveled to my home for a visit. A day I'll always cherish. Here is Vee's account of that day:  Meeting Abby and Bill

Thank you again for your prayers at this time for Vee and her family. She is very appreciative of them and wants you to know that. 

Blessings to you all dear ones. 

Lilacs Will Bloom Again

A Gloomy Gus who is prone to making a fuss...that pretty much describes my temperament.  The good news is that I  never have any doubts that I need The Savior. I am not one  who wrongly believes that she is going to heaven based on her sweet nature or good works. I am going because I know in Whom I have believed and all that He did for me (and you) on the cross.
It has been discussed before, but one of my favorite sermons (I only remember two or three after a lifetime of listening to them) is "Roses Will Bloom Again." You can see the connection. 
When spring looked doubtful, and it's still looking pretty shaky, I fretted. My fretting and whining and complaining did not change a thing. The lilacs are blooming in spite of it all. God is good. He's always on time. He doesn't change.

It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is Thy faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22–23

☼
This week, and just for this week, I am trying to post every single day.  I'm going to try because I am feeling chatty and don't want to overload any one post with an excess of hodge podge as I have done in past weeks. I do not expect anyone to visit more often or comment more often. In fact, like today's post, I may just shut comments off altogether except for Tuesday's post.  Still looking for the balance. That way, you can look (if you want) and then scamper off to springtime pursuits, presuming that spring has actually arrived where you live. ☺
Today I have seen the hand of God in everything. One miracle after another. I am afraid that I won't be keeping my promise about posting this week because of pressing concerns. John is in cardiac care after suffering a tear in his aorta. He was airlifted to a major medical center where he was in surgery for six hours this afternoon and evening. If you are a praying person, I covet your prayers for him. We know that he is a blessed man for having been in the right places at the right times with the right people able to help. When I can, I'll provide an update.

Meeting Donna

It’s so much fun to meet a blogger. Donna of Cottage Days and Journeys is the ninth whom I have been privileged to meet in person. A meeting is an extension of the friendship that has already been established for some years.  We all say that. Meeting seems just as natural as natural can be. If you ever get the chance to meet a fellow blogger, grab it!

Donna was in Maine with a group of photographers taking pictures of iconic Maine. I am so looking forward to seeing some of the photos that she took while here. I have one and here it is…

This is one that Donna took with her iPhone and shared with me via email. She did not give me permission to use it here so I'll have to beg her forgiveness. It is just so cool! It's the kind of photo that one can expect to see at Cottage Days...

This is another, the only photo taken at our meeting. It was almost an afterthought and a way to prove that we actually had been there at the same time in the same place.

She wants me to tell you this: Please remind everyone that I am NOT a portrait photographer, nor do I take selfies. What an embarrassment for my standard of photographic quality!  Hahaha...  The photo simply documents two dear blogging friends who finally met in person (after many, many years) and loved each other more as a result.

I can’t say it any better than that.

We met in Freeport (home of L.L. Bean’s flagship store) at a pizza bistro where we enjoyed yummy brick oven pizzas. No pics. Sorry! We were there after lunch and a few hours before supper so it worked out well for us to chat and chat.  Donna is just as cute and vibrant as she can be. She was dressed as she would be in the field — like the photographer that she is. She had been up before the dawn to take pictures of the sunrise at Pemaquid and still she was soldiering on through a blogging meet after a long drive. Our conversation was our own and I am blessed that we had it. I’ll not soon forget all that Donna shared.

~Jams and Donna's own photography in Note Cards~

After saying our goodbyes, I left with gifts and a full heart and the determination to get John into the car for a drive the following day. 

I’m happy to report that the drive happened and John and I had a lovely forsythia seeking adventure culminating with supper out. Meals out two days in a row...woot!

~forsythia~

~a yard full of daffodils~

~looking down upon our town~

Thank you, Donna, for everything. It would be lovely if our paths should cross again!

ツ

Zingers

So I was opening a new box of Cheerios while John watched when he said, "Stop! Make sure that you're opening from the right end."

"Do you think that I don't know how to open a cereal box?" I asked rather testily.

"Are you telling me that you have never opened the wrong end?"

"That's exactly what I'm telling you!"

"So all those other things you do are just flukes?"

Well, I never! If this keeps up we'll be a short skip and a hop from Can This Marriage Be Saved? ☺


We visited the boys and their tree last week. Sam had invited us as he wanted to show it off. It was a very pretty tree. They always have a real one and it smelled so good. Sam's favorite ornaments are the Santa hats, which are really egg cozies re-purposed.

   That's Jack the Beagle to the left and Bazil the Pug by the fire. Some grandmothers take pictures of the family. Mine was moving around too much.
After a while (45 minutes or so), Jakob asked, "When are these people going to go and get up to their own devices?" Well I never! On Christmas Day, the same grand had asked me if he could use my iPad and I said that he could except that I forgot where it was. Into the air he announces, "What's up with these old ladies who don't know where their iPads are?!" We are grooming him for Saturday Night Live. ☺☺☺
(Jakob loves the turn of a phrase and often enjoys using one that he has recently found in his reading or overheard. I try valiantly not to laugh, but it is very difficult not to guffaw. I'll leave the discipline to his parents who both had a turn with these situations.)
Jakob made a sweet ornament that has hung beautifully on our tree this season. I may have been reaching as it was being presented when I was politely told by his mom that he had made it especially for John.  Yes,  John and Jakob are buds. And that warms this Nonni's heart.  

I baked a pecan pie yesterday for our Epiphany dessert this evening. If you are honoring Epiphany, have a blessed one! Either way, enjoy a beautiful day... 

In the Garden and On the Roof

Thought I'd share a few garden photos and not because the garden is looking so fine. It was a rough winter and it has been a rough spring. Beyond that, I did a lot of culling last autumn so there are bare patches, odd clumps here and there, and thinned foliage. I am still not sure whether the azalea is going to make it. My darling was a bit overzealous with the angle of the cuts. My two younger azaleas are in similar shape from my attentions. The rhubarb has bolted to seed and I really need to get that under control. The lilacs are still here, but not for much longer.

The Bolero Lilies (Asian) are doing well and will bloom soon. I believe I have the pests under control this year by treating the soil and killing the grubs. 
I also have a new tool that is making gardening ever so much better for me. This tool weeds for me! It's a scuffle hoe, aka hula hoe, stirrup hoe, etc. 

It allows a bit of movement at the head and the blade (looks like a stirrup) cuts the roots below and lifts them out. I have created a nice rhubarb bed with it and I can keep ahead of the weeds in my small beds. We have a lot of baby oak trees trying to get a start. They have been a big problem because they don't pull out easily with that plug of an acorn at the end. The scuffle hoe works marvelously. No more endless tugging. My new project is creating a brick path for the mower to follow. This way, my helpful neighbor won't be getting too close to my flower bed blowing clipped grass back into it. That's the hope anyway.

A lot of purple just now with the bearded irises and various purple columbines. You can see the bare spots and just get a glimpse of the over-pruned azalea in the background at the near corner of the house.

Macro shots look better just now. I do love Columbines.

I know that some love Siberian Irises and, if I had one, I'm certain that I'd love it, too. I have bearded irises, which I love. I appreciate the fact that bearded irises look better with age. Not many things can say that!

Yes, it's something of a purple riot out there, but soon the roses will be blooming and the daylilies and the astilbe and, hopefully, the two lonely peonies. That's potentilla in the foreground, which blooms yellow, my personal favorite. It was one of the plants my mother brought to me one hot summer day saying that it wasn't doing well in her garden because a certain someone was bent on mowing it down. The story of her life!

John has been back on the roof fixing the entry way that a squirrel managed to create. That's right! We had a squirrel in the basement and it gained access from the roof. Ai yi yi! You've never known excitement until you've had a squirrel in the cellar. It's taken me weeks to get that sorted. In fact, Fioré has been so wound up that we may not ever recover.
Must scoot as "the kids" are having a yard sale today and tomorrow and I just so happen to have a bunch of stuff to donate to their cause. Yay for even slight progress! (I was going through the grands' toy box here and was overcome by all those Thomas the Train items that they don't love anymore. Apparently, I still do!)
A fun, relaxing, blessed weekend to you!